PERFECTIONISM VERSUS MASTERY: Which Are You Striving For?
“What’s wrong with perfectionism?” I asked. “It depends,” my coach said. “Are you coming from a place of love or fear?”
What does that mean?
I had always prided myself on my perfectionistic tendencies. Didn't that just mean that I cared greatly about my output?
Not exactly.
My coach explained to me that perfectionism meant having extremely high – even impossible – standards and if those standards aren’t being met, then it can leave one feeling ‘not good enough’.
Hmmmmm……that sounded familiar.
She went on to explain that when constantly striving for perfection, sometimes it's normalized to not try at all. I mean, why bother meeting those unrealistic expectations right? And that comes from a place of fear.
Mastery, on the other hand, means having great skill and knowledge in a subject area. It takes time, it makes mistakes and learns from them. Mastery isn't striving for perfection; it's searching for growth. It embraces progress over perfection. It recognizes the growth mindset. When one is striving for mastery, it's based on love for what one aspires to do or become.
Do you find yourself striving for perfection in everything you do? How does that feel? Instead, what if you asked yourself "What can I do to improve here?" So, how do you flip the internal switch?
Here are some ways to move into mastery
Take More Risks
The mastery mindset is less afraid of failure. It knows it's just part of the path. So start small, but do start.
Continuous Learning
Perfectionists often believe that there is a peak to their learning and say things like “When I know this, I will have that”. Not so for mastery. Learning is never-ending. You will never have all the answers because there’s always something new to learn.
Share Knowledge
On the road to mastery, you know that being open and sharing your ideas allows others to do the same and you can compound your knowledge. You become even more of an expert in your subject area.
The Cost of Perfectionism
Perfectionism can be costly, not only in terms of mental and emotional well-being but also in productivity and creativity. Constantly seeking flawlessness can lead to procrastination, as the fear of not achieving perfect results can paralyze action. Additionally, it can stifle innovation, as taking creative risks often involves making mistakes and learning from them.
Practical Steps to Shift from Perfectionism to Mastery
Set Realistic Goals: Instead of aiming for perfect outcomes, set achievable and measurable goals. Break larger tasks into smaller, manageable steps and celebrate progress along the way.
Focus on Process, Not Just Outcome: Emphasize the learning and growth that occur during the process. Reflect on what you've learned after completing a task, regardless of the outcome.
Practice Self-Compassion: Be kind to yourself when things don't go as planned. Acknowledge your efforts and understand that mistakes are a natural part of the learning process.
Seek Feedback: Engage with mentors, peers, and colleagues to get constructive feedback. This can provide valuable insights and help you improve without the pressure of being perfect.
Develop a Growth Mindset: Embrace challenges as opportunities to grow. View failures as learning experiences and recognize that abilities can be developed through dedication and hard work.
We are all on this planet to be the best versions of ourselves. The mastery mindset is simply more congruent with becoming your best. It appreciates the journey.
So, from a recovering perfectionist, what could be different for you if you reframed striving for perfection, to striving for excellence and mastery?